i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I FOUND THE LEGS
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
