found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize