I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
