Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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