it was like eating out sand paper
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
