Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Randomize
