the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
honey bunches of taint.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
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