drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
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