So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize
