i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
meet me or not, i'm out of control
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Just high enough for therapy.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
