Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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