Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
