remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I am never drinking with the goths again.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
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