How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Randomize
