We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
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