New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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