And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
