Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I have fence marks all over my body
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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