thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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