dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
