Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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