everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
He did a backflip because drugs
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
