i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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