i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
