just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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