Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
is this the sara with the beer cane?
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
You are the jesus of drinking
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
