Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Randomize
