We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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