she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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