Your tits are I can't wait for
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
