you would pick up someone in the library
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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