ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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