We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
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