Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
