Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
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