I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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