is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize