THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Randomize
