I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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