That's intense
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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