How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
