no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
