Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize