I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
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