I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
