We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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