hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
it hurts more in the daytime
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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