So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Randomize