Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
