It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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