I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize